Unrealistic dreams?

I think I'm OVER the sadness and all (I hope). Now all i want is LONG NICE SLIM LEGS!!!!!!!!!!!

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NEW HOLIDAY RESOLUTION

( ) 1 Pair of Nice Long Legs
( ) Flat flat tummy

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But i still want to make my nice nice chocolate fondant cake...how? ><

:( Not Happy :(

Have you had times, when you regretted something so much, that you wish again and again that you can turn back time and change things? that it haunts you repeatedly day after day, and your heart sinks everything you think about it? You know that you've screwed things up and there's nothing left that can be done. But you still try to close your eyes and wish that when you open them none of those happened. And you keep thinking about it until it drives you nuts.

Delusions

What happens if I fail med school? I will end up baking cupcakes and eating them instead of selling them. Contribute to the obese and the diabetic. My parents will have to help me mend my cupcake store if there is one because the million dollar invested in me has gone to waste. And I will make sure the store is full of pink and purple. I am sure Dad will not be pleased. So may be I can pretend to be a doctor whilst I sell my cupcakes in Australia? Which medical student blogs a day before her exams? Every other medical student is cramming away in mountains of notes and textbooks and practise questions. I didn't even finish reading that darn oxford handbook of clinical medicine which is fatter then everyone else's 'cause it's from India. I didn't even touch Davidsons. I only watched master chef every single day and played with Typing Maniac on facebook. Now tell me, do you think I will do well? I'll let you know when results come out.

i want that AUD450 pigeon and truffle dish on masterchef

RANT

i hate my memory forming abilities. i dislike my hippocampus. i hate how information just passes through my brain without leaving any marks behind. i hate how i study and study and study and nothing goes in. i hate how i procrastinate by blogging and facebooking and by playing psp everyday. i hate why other people can remember things i can't remember. i hate it when people look and me and think that i am incompetent and dumb. i hate it when i look back at my notes if i were to remember them i would've been able to answer so many more questions. i hate the fact that why i am not smart enough. i hate it when people keep thinking they are smarter than me and show it to me. why am i able to memorise 100 chinese poems in a week when i was little and win the poem reciting competition and i no longer have that ability anymore. i thought i was pretty smart but apparently not so anymore. i hate the feeling when i know i read it and i don't remember it. i hate how i paid so much for my uni education and they can't even guarantee a good job when i graduate. i hate how other people only care about themselves. i hate the pimples popping out of my face. i hate the numbers in my bank account. i hate it when i stand on the weighing machine.

i just hate sitting for exams. AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Internet is SO DISTRACTING.